ANN ARBOR–The team drew a collected sigh of relief Sunday night after it was determined that Steven Golombisky scored the fourth goal in Aventinus’s 4-0 shut-out of the Yak-o-topes. “I was worried for a minute,” said defenseman Dave Ferguson.
Center Chris Sutton scored three goals in the second period to wipe out any hope the Yak-o-topes had of staying in the game. However, such an offensive display can come with a price, causing concern for the team.
The worries come amid league-wide clamping down on “quality” players. “Anyone who scores a few too many goals is likely to be on the radar,” explained GM Mark Woods. “Next thing you know, your best player is moving on to an upper league.”
Understanding this, most of the rest of the team has kept their goal-scoring production down in an effort to remain in the league. Defenseman Mark Woods has been an absolute master, “purposefully” scoring about one goal per year to keep officials from ever suspecting he has any scoring potential whatsoever. He has in addition been sighted falling down while skating for that “added touch.”
“Chris is either young or ambitious or both,” said management officials. “Either he’ll learn or he’ll have to move up. He’d better be careful or else he’ll find himself playing in the NHL.”
Added officials: “Who wants that? Am I right?”