Byrd Soars Over Ice Men

Jaron Byrd scored three goals and assisted on another as Ashley’s Hopslam (3-4-2) rolled past the defending champions Ice Men 6-2 Saturday night on Varsity Rink. “Hope you’re enjoying your ringers!” one of the Ice Men yelled from the bench after Byrd’s third goal.

“Hey, I’ve been waiting ten (bleeping) years for some ringers!” exclaimed winger Tom Colis. “I’m going to enjoy this!”

Dexter Benda, another new addition to the team this season, had a goal and an assist, while newcomer Jim Socha also added two assists.

“At this rate, it won’t be long before I’ll be asked to move down to Tier II,” mused defenseman Mark Woods. To his dismay, no one said anything to the contrary.

“Good thing I’m in good with the General Manager,” Woods added.

The front office had no official statement.