Hopslam Explodes All Over Maidens, Men

In a game that featured a shortened bench, Hopslam (6-6-2) extended its win streak to 3 games by beating Gates Ps & Vs (aka Maidens & Men) 6-3 Saturday night on Olympic ice. Gary Witt opened things up with a roofer in the first period.

Witt credited his prowess around the netting to center Scott Coates. “(He) was constantly telling me to ‘get it up,'” he noted.

The line of the night, however, belonged to Mike Leighton (3 goals, 1 assist), Tom Colis (1 goal, 3 assists), and Jaron Byrd (5 assists), who were unstoppable. “Making passes and scoring came easy for them,” said GM Mark Woods after the game. “They were very popular in high school.”

The social networks were abuzz when forward Jeff Price reportedly offered to join the Coates, Witt, Brock threesome after forward Bob Brock did not come… to the game. Price stated that he was more than willing to bring de-flowers to break the seal of any deal. Witt, according to sources said to Price that he wanted things to “flow well, so do your magic.”

Witt later said that Coates “got none,” and as a result, “was mad.”

“Those guys have a lot of spunk,” said Woods. “I guess that’s why they beat off Maidens & Men so easily, no matter who was in what position.”