ANN ARBOR–Ashley’s Hopslam (10-5) slammed Gates Maidens & Men & Mott and John (figuratively and literally) Saturday night 7-1, reaching double digit victories for the first time in recent memory (and quite possibly ever). Mike Leighton had a goal, 3 assists, and two penalties, including a rough on John Vella, who exercised his Plan C free agency “furlough” option, playing on a limited loan with the Gates team.
“That’s what I do,” said Leighton, in reference to scoring goals, dishing assists, and handing out tough penalties.
Goaltender Paul Sholtis continued his solid play, stopping all shots, excepting the penalty shot taken by Keith Schultz in the first. “That goalie has really good form,” said a league spokesperson.
Scott Coates has heated up in recent games, grabbing two goals and an assist, as did newcomer Andrew Thompson, who also scored two goals and an assist.
But the biggest surprise of the night came just twenty seconds into the game when defenseman Mark Woods scored his first goal of the season with a wrist shot from the corner. “I was pretty jazzed about it until I heard that the goalie (Chris Barrett) was shelled earlier tonight,” said Woods.
Barret gave up 12 goals in the previous game, and sustained what appeared at first blush to be a season ending knee injury. However, the goalie recovered in less than 12 parsecs, beating the celebrated Kessel Run time by Han Solo.
“A parsec is a unit of distance, not time,” said Shotis, an Aerospace Engineering major at a large Midwestern university.
Said Leighton regarding Woods’ goal: “Maybe I’ll see Bigfoot or a mermaid. Or a werewolf. If Mark can score a goal, anything is possible.”
“We pay Mark to shut down the opposition’s offense,” said GM Mark Woods in defense of his defenseman. “But, as you can see from his play, we don’t pay him a lot.”