ANN ARBOR– Times are tough. Since the economic turmoil began in 2008, American– from Main Street to Wall Street– has felt the pinch. Even top-level professional athletes. Nowhere is this most poignant than in the tragic case of one Dr. Dave Winn, who now juggles (sometimes literally) three jobs just to make ends meet, including a moonlighting gig as a “math-e-magician.”
Winn delights audience at backyard children’s party with “math-e-magic”
Prior to playing in a 2-4 loss against St. Anky Beer Sunday night, Winn admitted to fellow Hopslam teammates that his salary as a professional hockey player and second job as a physics professor for the University of Michigan were simply not paying the bills. “In fact,” said sources at TSN (Total Sports Network), “Winn is actually paying to play hockey. It’s actually a drain on him financially!”
Though Winn teaches physics, he stated that a large part of what he does is “applied” rather than “theoretical,” thus requiring an extensive background in mathematics. He displayed his numeric prowess by noting that the numbers on the jerseys for those who scored last night- including #4 Sean McGrath and #87 Jeff Meden (goal), along with assists from #48 John Vella, # 14 Mark Woods, and #50 Brad Johnson, added up to “a lot.”
Winn then entertained the group with more mature comedic math content by asking “how many Johnsons are on the team?” He noted that the real answer was three (Derek, Brad, and Al), but smiled at the obvious insinuation.