ATLANTA– Sportswriter Mark Woods found it “kinda difficult” to write about Hopslam’s 4-0 win Tuesday night while waiting at the Atlanta terminal for his flight Thursday afternoon when three passengers purportedly from Wisconsin discussed everything from friend’s pregnancies to septuagenarian parents with children still in adolescence. “It’s bad enough it took me this long to even start the article, but then to have to listen to those hillbillies talking about who has larger knee caps… it’s a little distracting.”
Several travelers distract Woods with their “inane” chatter while he attempts to write about Hopslam’s 4-0 win over Tope Solo
Woods noted that the trio had to be “hicks” based solely on the somewhat oversized body types of the three and the camouflage baseball cap worn by the man. “I didn’t look to see if he had all of his teeth, but I bet one of them had a chip in it from opening beer bottles,” added Woods.
The trio talked continuously with the two women making perfunctory efforts to “shush” the man’s so-called comic stylings, as he philosophized on a number of topics. “Why are you knee caps so huge?” he asked the younger lady. “I’d rather have my kids younger and be done with it,” he said, later rescinding the statement and noting that he liked the idea of being a 50-something father of a high school graduate.
Despite the distraction, Woods still managed to note that Jim Socha scored three goals, while Andrew Thompson added a goal in the win. Chris Sutton had two assists, while Al Juback and Scott Coates added assists.
The team will face Tope Solo again Thursday night, while Woods will thankfully not have to face the hillbillies. “They boarded the plane, making it nice and quiet over here.” Woods then worried that they might read the article later, but remembered that the likelihood of literacy made that somewhat unlikely.