ANN ARBOR– Tom Colis scored the lone goal for Aventinus as they were routed by the Ice-o-topes D2 team 1-5 Wednesday night. The third straight loss had newcomers Jon Hwang, Robert Texeira, and Kenny Schmidt wondering if joining the team was a good idea.
“I bet they’re hoping their checks bounce,” said GM Mark Woods. “But the joke’s on them, cause they’re fiscally responsible citizens.”
In fact, Accounts Receivable for Ashley’s Hockey assured the Ashley’s News Network that the checks “have been cashed, the cash has been stashed,” and that there was not much else left to do but wait for the “hash to be bashed.”
Ashley Public Relations Department quickly noted that “illegal narcotics are in no way used or condoned by anyone affiliated with the Ashley’s franchise,” and that they “strongly encourage children and adults to simply say ‘no’ to drugs.”
“Or else move to Colorado,” added PR Director Shay Kenbake.