ANN ARBOR–The Depot Town Stags suffered a 1-4 loss to Ashley’s Ruination Saturday, thanks to newcomer Bruce Conner’s game-winner, despite specifically asking Conner not to bring the team down. After repeated accusations of staying out late with his so-called “fancy” friends, reveling in crazy nights, and warnings that he might someday break his glass (a colloquial expression referring to being forced to resort to emergency measures) and the need to curtail such actions, Depot Town Stags captain Jeff Lynn urged Conner to “get it right” one of these days.
“He looked great out there,” said Lynn, likening him unto a snake slithering smoothly through the grass. “But I can’t understand why he ignored my one request.”
“He really brought me down,” added Lynn.
No mention was made to disappointment in the goals scored by Nate Greenman, John Vella, and Sean Hazaray, nor assists or disco moves performed by Dave Winn, Ricky Winowiecki, and Chris Sutton.