ANN ARBOR– Despite a deep thigh bruise suffered early last week, goaltender Matt Okray shook off what he called “boredom” to blank St. Anky Beer, as Hopslam earned a 5-0 win Saturday night. “Matt’s our goalie, and that Okray by me,” said GM Mark Woods, receiving no laughter whatsoever from the quip.
Five different players scored, including Ryan Williams, Andrew Thompson, Kevin Lao, David Gaydos, and Jeff Phillion. Woods tried to make several other play on the players last names, including “Jeff was really filling in for us when we were short-staffed,” and “Kevin got the message, Lao and clear,” again, to no avail.
In desperation, Woods stated he intended to write mean things abut every one in a book, passing it around among the other middle school children, who will add to the mean-spirited comments in what he called a “Hop-Slam Book.”
“I’ll show them,” he vowed menacingly.