Goon, Going, Gone

Ashley’s Ruination (9-7-2) dropped a close battle with rival Goon Squad 1-2 Saturday night on Olympic ice. The game was marred by poor management on the part of referee simply known as Silvennoinen (his first name does not have letters in the English alphabet) after failing to blow an offside play dead.

Defenseman Jason Spence knocked the offender into the net and received a penalty. Despite digging deep into his rhetorical bag of tricks, he was unable to convince the referees, and as a result received a game misconduct.

“Did you see how high stick flew into the air?” asked Steve Gorham?

When asked to explain the decision to allow an offside play to continue, Silvenoinen simply said, “Ya, I was confused.”

“He does that,” said winger Dexter Benda.

The incident seemed to spark the Goons, as they took advantage of the penalty, scoring a minute later in the second period. Another score five minutes later made it a seemingly insurmountable 2-0 lead.

However, Ruination dug in. Rusty Barron was brilliant in net as he faced continuous pressure in the third period, all the while maintaining his cool, even when an offside call was nearly missed again.

“I had to yell it out before he finally blew the whistle,” exclaimed an exasperated Mark Woods. “He almost missed the call.”

“He’s been doing that all night, Mark.” explained Justin DiCenso.

Brett Vogel was able to cut the lead to one with a minute and a half to go. Ruination got a few good chances, but were unable to tie it up.

“I still have a fury over that call,” said Spence Monday morning.