ANN ARBOR–Forward Bob Brock has fallen upon hard times–quickly. No sooner did the league announce his suspension following an altercation in Hopslam’s 3-2 win over Cubs AC Wednesday night than Brock was found with not much more than tattered rags…
Author: ashleyadmin
Aventinus Channel Milli Vanilli
ANN ARBOR–Ashley’s Aventinus finished their season on a somewhat flat note after losing to the Yak-a-Topes 5-6 Wednesday night on Varsity Ice, prompting the question: who is to blame? “I blame it on (GM) Mark Woods,” said Chris Boulter, who…
Team To Get In Touch With Emotional Intelligence
ANN ARBOR–Following Ruination’s 2-3 loss Monday to the Black Bears, GM Mark Woods scheduled a forthcoming seminar on Emotional Intelligence to help the team learn to read each other’s feelings and respond positively and productively. “The hope is to create…
Blame It On Tuttle
ANN ARBOR–Desperate for answers following Hopslam’s 0-3 loss Sunday night to Bearshark, the team has created a fictional skater upon whom they’ve heaped the blame for the game and all mistakes made throughout the season. The unfortunate goat: Captain Tuttle.…
A Boulter Lightning
ANN ARBOR–Chris “Insane” Boulter shot out of nowhere Sunday night, striking early and often as Aventinus ran past the Goaldiggers 6-4 on Olympic Ice. “He was like a Jamaican sprinter on skates,” said an excited GM Mark Woods, “Only a…
Woods’s Triple PhD Proves Useful
ANN ARBOR–Following Ruination’s Thursday evening 0-4 loss to the Ypsi Aces, defenseman Mark Woods traded in his helmet for his thinking cap, providing auxiliary lectures for several of the players who are finishing degree programs at the local college, thanks…
Petulant Youths Sent to Principal’s Office
ANN ARBOR–Ice Cube Elementary principal Abram Colwell had a busy day Wednesday when several boys were sent to the office following separate but related playground incidents during scheduled “playground time.” “Number 73 started it,” claimed Louie Fulcher through tear-stained eyes.…