ANN ARBOR– Sure, they are champions again for the first time since Winter 2017, and Hopslam players are grateful. “I’m grateful,” said center Matt Okray. Indeed, the sentiment was felt by all. “We all feel the same,” noted winger Chris…
Author: ashleyadmin
Ruination “All Gas, No Brakes” After Dubious Mexican Cuisine Decisions
ANN ARBOR– Ruination turned in an 11-8 win over Side Biscuit Spicy Boys, winning 11-8 against the Spicy Boys. And if that was repeating, so was Chris Klaft after a rough bout following a questionable burrito from “this guy selling…
Artie Pulls Out Stick from Ice Cube, Ascends Throne
ANN ARBOR– Calling this a “special” moment for Art Rautenberg, otherwise known as King Arthur III, abdicated his throne after son Artie successfully pulled out a hockey stick from a large block of ice, known as the Ann Arbor Ice…
Defund Referees Movement Comes Back to Haunt C League
ANN ARBOR– The Hack Lives Matter movement in the early part of 2020 called for the defunding of referees, prompting the liberalization of the interpretation of league rules and regulations, have come back to haunt the league Tuesday night in…
Widowmaker Tie Brings Fear, Speculation of Market Recession Among Investors/Players
ANN ARBOR– The 2-2 tie Friday night fueled speculation of a market downturn among the various managers of the Widowmaker hedge fund. “When you have an up and down day that ends with no gain, or a ‘tie’ as it…
BREAKING NEWS–Pletcher Uses Hermione’s Time Turner to Attend Multiple Games
ANN ARBOR– The Quidditch.. er, Hockey World was rocked Sunday evening to discover goaltender Gary Pletcher has been illegally time turning in order to attend multiple games at the same time. GM Mark Woods noticed this following the Hopslam game…
Goalies Decide They’ve Had GAA Too Low, Far Too Long
ANN ARBOR– In a stunning turn of events, both Matt Okray and Gary Pletcher announced that they were “sick and tired of having super low goals against” following Hopslam’s 7-7 tie with the Cleveland Steamers. “The pressure to maintain a…