ANN ARBOR– In an age where reports of the statistics not telling the so-called real story, the resulting 2-3 loss Hopslam suffered at the hands of Cubs AC is actually and factually indicated by the statistics. According to the stat…
Author: ashleyadmin
Colwell Vows to Sweep Ruination’s Leg
ANN ARBOR– Following Ruination’s 10-2 win over the newly-formed Oilers Saturday night, league director Abe Colwell, working undercover as a right winger, later vowed not to rest until “Ruination is completely dismantled.” They’re gonna have to put’em in a body…
Top 10 Comments Overheard in Aventinus Win
ANN ARBOR– Aventinus defeated North Coast 6-1 early Thursday. Scott Bray had three goals and an assist. Amy Senne added her second goal in two games, and Jeff Meden and Ginny Klinesteker each had a goal and an assist. Nate…
Iverson: “We Talkin’ Bout Boarding!”
ANN ARBOR– Following the 1-1 tie between Ashley’s Hopslam and the Yaks, Kathryn Iverson went on a two and a half minute rant about the boarding incident that took place late in the second period. “I’m supposed to be the…
Defenseman Enjoys Hallmark Channel
REDFORD–In lieu of playing in Aventinus’s 3-6 loss Sunday night to Mott FK, defenseman Mark Woods stayed home, opting to watch Hallmark Channel Christmas Specials. “They’re playing Karroll’s Christmas,” said Woods as of press time. According to the Hallmark Channel,…
YouTube A Slightly Sadder World
CYBERSPACE– For the Stag Nation, YouTube is typically a source of joy where the fans, those with nothing but time on their hands, and those who are mistakenly taken there after key word searching “stag party” come to see “Dr.”…
Minister of Beer Takes Job Seriously
CANTON– R. S. “Scotty” Coates expressed concern over the lack of “contributions” to the dwindling beer fund Thursday, prompting accusations and finger-pointing. “Mike (Leighton)… has already brought beer three times this season,” he declared. “As have Bob (Brock) and I,”…