ANN ARBOR– Following Ruination’s 7-1 Saturday win over then-undefeated Yaks C, controversy broke put in the front office during the press conference when Ruination’s status as either undefeated or unbeaten came to the fore. “We’re undefeated!” exulted COO Chris Sutton.…
Category: General
General news pertaining to the players, teams, the league, or even hockey in general
Note From Piper: “Time to Pay Me!”
LAKEPORT– Piper the dog, affectionately known as “Grammy’s dog, Piper” or “that damn dog,” sent a note to all three Ashley’s teams late Thursday regarding payment for the Winter season: “Woof woof woof woof, yip woof arf woof rrrrr woof-woof…
Ruination Celebrates Spicy Win by Rewriting Lyrics to 80s Songs to Include Missing Teammate
ANN ARBOR– Following their 6-2 win over Side Biscuit Spicy Boys, teammates celebrated by altering the titles or lyrics of 80s hit songs to include teammate Chris Sutton, who was reportedly “lying drunk on some beach in Mexico,” according to…
Ruination Wins Despite Being Down 3 Chris’s to Start Game
ANN ARBOR– Ruination started its season strong with a 6-3 win over Kraken Beers late Tuesday night despite being down 3 Chris’s at the start of the game. Armed with only Chris Sutton and Chris Radomile, the team added sure…
Hopslam Manager ‘Not Sure Why,’ But Has ‘Good Feeling’ About Upcoming Season
ANN ARBOR– General Manager Mark Woods expressed enthusiasm Monday as the Winter 2023 season is set to begin. “I can’t put my finger on it, but I just feel like this season will be a whole lot better.” Members of…
Disney+ Announces New Show: Leave It to Fever
HOLLYWOOD– Disney executives announced late Monday a new show designed to “return to that 50s charm,” starring Brian Lefevre in “Leave It to Fever.” “We’re super excited,” said Anita Fakeperson, head of Creative Marketing at Disney. “Brian will essentially play…
Ruination Win? Totes McYotes!
ANN ARBOR– Concerning any doubt that Ruination defeated the Yotes C 6-3 Tuesday evening, according to the fact check organization Catfish Phillips Fact Check Organization & Stuff. “Totes McGotes! They really won,” said CEO Catherine Fisch-Phillips. “I thought Totes McGotes…