Category: Ruination

Updates specific to Ashley’s Ruination team

Two Tiers Justified By Woods Goal

League director Abe Colwell felt good about his decision to maintain an upper and lower tier in the C-league after even defenseman Mark Woods was able to score against lower division Cleveland Steamers, who reportedly won the lower tier championship…

Ruination Take a Pass on Winning

A patchwork Ruination team (0-1) that included several Hopslam skaters was no match for Winter champions Goon Squad (1-0), falling 4-8 Saturday night. Goon Squad’s newly acquired Steve Sienkiewicz had three assists in his debut. “This guy’s even better than…

Ruination 5-Peat in Alternate Universe

Ashley’s Ruination earned their fifth straight championship Saturday night, defeating Goon Squad 5-0 in an alternate universe very similar to our own. Only the wispy, evil looking goatees on the faces of the Ruination skaters mark the differences between the…

Black Ops Picked Off, Ticked Off

Ashley’s Ruination dominated in their semi-final match-up with Black Ops Tuesday night, cruising to a 5-1 win marked by raw emotions. Riding high on a 5-3 win, Black Ops skated through warm-ups with swagger, and a surprise tactic. “Those guys…

Writer’s Strike Ends in Time for Playoffs

The Ashley’s Network experienced a so-called writer’s strike earlier in the week, lasting several tense hours as management met with union representatives to negotiate a “back-to-work” call Tuesday morning. “I’m just glad everything was settled and we’re back to work,”…

Mott Wins… Not

Mott (8-11) hung tough before a four-goal third period opened the game for Ashley’s Ruination (10-7-2) Tuesday night, as the team in red cruised to a 10-5 victory. The win also secures the Ruination’s 10th victory and a winning record for…