Category: Oberon

Updates specific to Ashley’s Oberon team

Vella Maximizes Ice Time

ANN ARBOR– Forward John Vella has been noted as a player who prefers more ice time, complaining of “too many players showing up” when the roster reaches seven skaters, and even skating a few laps alongside the Zamboni following games.…

New Rule Confounds Oberon, DiCenso

ANN ARBOR– The latest rule changes from the front office in Toronto makes it possible for referees to administer a “pay-per-punch” series of penalties to suit the situation, according to league officials early March. These changes were immediately seen Saturday…

Shoulder-Gate Rocks Rink

ANN ARBOR– Oberon lost 2-7 to Ice-o-topes C Tuesday night, but not without a controversy surrounding it when Tope Jeff “Shrug-it-in” Menk scored a goal by redirecting a shot with his shoulder for the Ice-o-topes’ second goal. “A player can…

“Lottery Win Sure Would Help”

REDFORD– Desperate to keep the dozens of fans infotained,sports writer Mark Woods admitted Friday that winning the lottery “sure would help” to give him the free time needed to write articles for the sports teams in the local area, including…

If a Puck Drops, Woods, Bears… Would You Read It?

RUINATION– The B-League is under investigation in what some are calling a “point-shaving” scandal after a knee injury side-lined Yaks goaltender Matthew Weiler. The game took a strange turn, however, when back-up goaltender “Yakkity Yak” Don Talc-Bach, seemingly refused to…

Games Pile Up

RUINATION– Ruination lost 3-8 Thursday night, prompting defenseman Sean Payeur to┬álead the entire team in yogic breathing exercises to help the team “find their center.” GM Mark Woods praised Payeur, calling him “the voice of calm in the hockey din.”…