ANN ARBOR– Ashley’s Hopslam players expressed fatigue following their 4-7 loss to the Cleveland Steamers Saturday night. “We were just pooped,” said defenseman Mark Woods. Hopslam started slowly as the Steamers quickly dropped 3 pucks into the net in the…
Author: ashleyadmin
Ben Johnson Edges Carl Lewis to Join Ruination
ANN ARBOR– According to the stat sheet, it seems former Canadian Olympic sprinter Ben Johnson has joined Ashley’s Ruination, edging out Carl Lewis’ bid to bring Olympic gold to the perennial C-league champions. Johnson, who was part of an illegal…
Witt Drinks, Shoots, Leafs
ANN ARBOR– Ashley’s Aventinus made one of its better showings, but fell to the Leafs 3-6 Wednesday night, disproving the growing belief that winger Gary Witt’s presence correlates with winning.”There goes that theory!” a teammate said over the din of…
Hopslam Votes “No” On Referendum
ANN ARBOR– Ashley’s Hopslam voted against independence Wednesday, following their Tuesday night win over St. Anky Beer. In a 4-3 vote, the team decided to remain a part of Ashley’s franchise, along with Ruination, Aventinus, and Bud Light Lime, the…
Witt-less in Loss
ANN ARBOR– Ashley’s Aventinus continues to be a tale of two teams, losing another close game Sunday night, this time to Mott FK 1-2. Defenseman Jeff Price scored the team’s lone goal in the second period, tying the game. However,…
Ruination Indicted for Beating
ANN ARBOR– Ashley’s Ruination turned itself in early Sunday after charges of beating Black Ops with sticks (sometimes known as “twigs” or “switches” depending from which part of the country one hails) Saturday night. According to the team’s doctor, Black…
Hopslam: Suited For Tie
ANN ARBOR– In a back and forth game that saw the return of long time veterans Joe DeRose, Joe Crossno, and Jim Socha, Ashley’s Hopslam finished with a 4-4 tie against Sasquatch. “Sorry for skating like crap,” said DeRose. “I have…