ANN ARBOR– One of the many complaints made to developer Dong Nguyen in his latest game ‘Hoppy Bird’ includes the extreme difficulty getting the bird past the pipes. “We only managed to do it three times the other day,” noted…
Category: Hopslam
Updates specific to Ashley’s Hopslam team
Puckola Scandal Revealed!
ANN ARBOR– Center Scott Coates was recently seen handing an undisclosed sum of money to “someone at the top” of the league’s administrative staff in what is suspected to be a bribery scheme, or “puckola” scandal that has fans questioning…
Nightmare Sports Weekend Soothed by Hopslam
ANN ARBOR– Ashley’s Hopslam was perhaps the lone bright spot in what was otherwise a string of unfortunate events taking place over the weekend. The team overcame a late-arriving goaltender to defeat the Ice Dogs 4-1 Saturday, getting goals from…
The Bell Tolls for Sasquatch
ANN ARBOR– As stoic as a Hemingway character and as brash as each and every member of Metallica, Luke Bell sounded the alarm for a lumbering Sasquatch comeback bid, scoring 2 goals and assisting on a third to pull away…
Bieber Fever Consumes Hopslam Player
PUNTA CHAME– Ashley’s Hopslam had the wind knocked out of them upon hearing news that Justin Bieber has fled Miami and was spotted on a Panama beach with lady friend Chantal Jeffries, who allegedly goaded the 19-year-old pop star into…
These (Goals) Go to Eleven
ANN ARBOR– Amid the 2-5 loss to rival Yaks Tuesday night, Ashley’s Hopslam otherwise skated to a 2-2 tie excepting goals from defenseman Ed O’Brien. “The numbers all go to eleven (O’Brien),” explained Yaks spokesman Nigel Tufnel. “Look, right across…
Crazy Eights: More Than Just a Card Game
ANN ARBOR– Hopslam finally put one in the win column, thanks in part by great goal-tending from Jeff Phillion and timely scoring from the “Crazy Eights” as they have been dubbed by the media: No. 8 Bob Brock (goal), No.…