ANN ARBOR– Suffering the good-natured ribbing from his younger compatriots, Mark Johnston quietly notched Aventinus’s lone goal, ensuring the 1-1 tie versus the Yaks 2 Wednesday night, despite the alleged hacking earlier. “I thought I saw Ron (Coleman) getting cross-checked in…
Category: Aventinus
Updates specific to Ashley’s Aventinus team
Winning Weekend
HOPSLAM– Scott Coates gloated as Hopslam raced past Gates 7-2 Saturday night, scoring 3 goals and an assist, including a short-handed goal. Coates made a “painting” motion with each goal, claiming to “add another Coates.” He later claimed that hand…
Head, Butt Puts Coleman on Ice
ANN ARBOR– The highlight (or low light) of the 1-5 Aventinus loss to Ice-o-Topes 2 early Thursday morning was the collision between forward Ken Coleman and referee Luke Hattie. “I don’t know what happened,” said Coleman. Early in the first period,…
Sports Round-Up
RUINATION– Rusty Barron notched his first shutout of the season in an 8-0 win over Depot Town Stags, in accordance with the prophecy. “It has been foretold,” say the spooky guy in the shadows wearing a velvet robe and speaking…
Boucher’s Best: Beer Brought
ANN ARBOR– Defenseman Ed Boucher saved an otherwise dismal game Wednesday night when he arrived– in dramatic fashion– with the beer. “Where the (bleep) is Ed?” asked a terse teammate, thirsty and frustrated from Aventinus’ 0-3 loss to bitter rival…
Allegations of Illegal Coping Rocks Aventinus
ANN ARBOR– League officials have been investigating allegations of an illegal coping scandal, reported sources Sunday night following Aventinus’ 0-2 loss to Mott FK. The team was last shut out in Game 3 of the Winter 2014 finals April 16,…
Insult Comic Entertains Aventinus
ANN ARBOR– Insult comic Hack Masters regaled Aventinus Wednesday night with his usual brand of biting comedy following the team’s 4-3 win over Goon Squad. “Hey, you got three girls and eight guys. Where am I? Alaska?” quipped Masters. “I…