ANN ARBOR– General Manager Mark Woods expressed enthusiasm Monday as the Winter 2023 season is set to begin. “I can’t put my finger on it, but I just feel like this season will be a whole lot better.” Members of…
Category: General
General news pertaining to the players, teams, the league, or even hockey in general
Disney+ Announces New Show: Leave It to Fever
HOLLYWOOD– Disney executives announced late Monday a new show designed to “return to that 50s charm,” starring Brian Lefevre in “Leave It to Fever.” “We’re super excited,” said Anita Fakeperson, head of Creative Marketing at Disney. “Brian will essentially play…
Ruination Win? Totes McYotes!
ANN ARBOR– Concerning any doubt that Ruination defeated the Yotes C 6-3 Tuesday evening, according to the fact check organization Catfish Phillips Fact Check Organization & Stuff. “Totes McGotes! They really won,” said CEO Catherine Fisch-Phillips. “I thought Totes McGotes…
Updated Matrix Movie To Feature Keanu Reeves saying “Whoa” when he sees Ruination’s Game 2 Results v Yaks C
HOLLYWOOD– Directors of the The Matrix Lana and Lilly Wachowski (formerly known as Larry and Andy Wachowski) announced late Tuesday the they were remastering/reshooting the film, notably the “Deja Vu” scene in which Neo sees a cat perform the same…
Yaks Add Scottie Scheffler to A2 C League Golf Scramble Coming in May
AUGUSTA– Following his win at the Master’s Sunday in Augusta, golfer Scottie Scheffler has accepted an invitation from the Yaks to play in their 4-man Spring Scramble starting in early May. “I feel like I can contribute to the team,”…
Hopslam: “That Game was Bull Schlitz!” Okray Uses New Math
ANN ARBOR– Hopslam fell to what sources are calling “some” Bull Schlitz in their 2-7 loss Tuesday night. However, news wires were having trouble picking up the actual score when field correspondent Matt Okray provided a cryptic assessment of the…
President Sleeps Through Ruination Tie
ANN ARBOR– Amidst a grueling travel schedule, President Joe Biden was caught dozing during Ruination’s 3-3 tie Tuesday evening with Bull Schlitz. “C’mon, man,” entreated the president. “I was at the COP26 just the other day, they have me coming…