ANN ARBOR– Defenseman Daryl Coleman had a little trouble putting on his new form-fitting hockey pants in Sunday night’s 1-8 loss to the Ice-o-topes 2. Explaining that they were an early Christmas gift, he noted that they were a snug…
Category: Aventinus
Updates specific to Ashley’s Aventinus team
Girl Season Opens, Aventinus Wins
ANN ARBOR– The debate over which hunting season officially began this Fall was quickly resolved Sunday night following Aventinus’s 4-2 win over the Goaldiggers: Girl season. According to sources, girl season opened sometime in mid-October. “This explains why (winger) Nate Greenman…
Fake Laughter, Real Tears
RUINATION– Every team in the C-league with the exception of the Black Bears cheered Tuesday night after Ruination notched a 3-0 win over Trend Millwork, essentially guaranteeing a move to the B-League for the Winter 2015 season. Noting that this…
Moustaches Twirled All Weekend
RUINATION– Calling the performance “uninspired,” Austin Feeney finished with a goal and assist while fellow teammate Tim Bredernitz dropped in three goals and an assist as Ashley’s Ruination beat the Depot Town Stags 6-1 Saturday night. Despite the win, Sean…
Hole-y Goalies!
HOPSLAM– Scott Coates scored four goals in the 9-7 win against Sasquatch Tuesday night, earning praise and commentary from fellow teammates. “He’s slow, he can’t or won’t stop or skate backwards, and he has nothing but complaints about everything from…
Diving and Dollars Weekend Extravaganza
HOPSLAM– Defenseman Steve Gorham had the audacity to fall after receiving a rough shove from Ice Dog James Marshall late in the third period of Hopslam’s 4-4 tie Saturday. He received an unsportsmanlike conduct for diving, and sentenced to three…
Playing Ketchup
AVENTINUS– The 0-2 loss to the Ice-o-topes D2 left a bitter taste in the mouth of defenseman Mark Woods until he discovered that the origin of that taste was actually that of Brussel sprouts. He was also surprised to discover…