ANN ARBOR–Ashley’s sports writer Mark Woods spoke recently of his daring escape Tuesday from the so-called hum-drum of office life, using a “personal day” while engine problems were assessed by the local Chevrolet dealer near Detroit, MI. “I wasn’t sure what to…
Month: February 2015
Writer Speaks of Daring Escape, Ruination Massacred
ANN ARBOR– Sports writer Mark Woods spoke recently of his daring escape only days ago from a dystopian city turned prison in time to report Ruination’s 2-12 defeat Monday night. “It was an incredible experience, though it pained my one…
Writer Speaks of Daring Escape, Aventinus Tied Up
ANN ARBOR– Ashley’s sports writer Mark Woods spoke recently of his daring escape only days ago from some undisclosed location in Europe, making his way back incredibly through impossible odds to report Aventinus’s 2-2 tie with the Leafs Sunday night. “It…
Steamers Smeared (Sorta)
ANN ARBOR– Hopslam fought off exhaustion, overcoming the feeling of being “pooped out,” in their 3-1 win over the Cleveland Steamers. “We’ve had to take a lot of (bleep) from the fans and the media,” said GM Mark Woods. “But, with this…
Shoulder-Gate Rocks Rink
ANN ARBOR– Oberon lost 2-7 to Ice-o-topes C Tuesday night, but not without a controversy surrounding it when Tope Jeff “Shrug-it-in” Menk scored a goal by redirecting a shot with his shoulder for the Ice-o-topes’ second goal. “A player can…
Bears Slowly Lulled into B-League
ANN ARBOR– The Black Bears topped Ashley’s Ruination 3-1 Monday night, pushing their B-League record to 4-1 in what appears to be a carefully laid trap set by league director Abe Colwell. “Yes, yes, it’s all coming together nicely,” he…
Patriots Now Charged with Deflating Seahawk Fans
SEATTLE– As if the Deflate-Gate coverage wasn’t already enough, allegations that the New England Patriots “deflated” fans throughout the Pacific Northwest Sunday have surfaced. Dubbed “Deflate-Gate II: Electric Boogaloo,” NFL officials have been forced to open a new investigation. “I’m…