ANN ARBOR– The latest rule changes from the front office in Toronto makes it possible for referees to administer a “pay-per-punch” series of penalties to suit the situation, according to league officials early March. These changes were immediately seen Saturday…
Hopslam Pooped from Steamers
ANN ARBOR– Ashley’s Hopslam reported feeling extremely fatigued following their grueling game with the Cleveland Steamers Saturday night. “The guys looked utterly pooped out,” said GM Mark Woods. “But I think that’s a load of crap.” Despite the loss, there…
Schlissel to Destroy Ruination
ANN ARBOR– Disaster will soon strike when University of Michigan president Mark Schlissel will make good on his vow to destroy Ashley’s Ruination when he confers degrees on several players, including perennial all-stars Dexter Benda and Jordan Swift. “We all…
Writer Speaks of Daring Escape, Hopslam Captures Big Foot
ANN ARBOR–Ashley’s sports writer Mark Woods spoke recently of his daring escape Tuesday from the so-called hum-drum of office life, using a “personal day” while engine problems were assessed by the local Chevrolet dealer near Detroit, MI. “I wasn’t sure what to…
Writer Speaks of Daring Escape, Ruination Massacred
ANN ARBOR– Sports writer Mark Woods spoke recently of his daring escape only days ago from a dystopian city turned prison in time to report Ruination’s 2-12 defeat Monday night. “It was an incredible experience, though it pained my one…
Writer Speaks of Daring Escape, Aventinus Tied Up
ANN ARBOR– Ashley’s sports writer Mark Woods spoke recently of his daring escape only days ago from some undisclosed location in Europe, making his way back incredibly through impossible odds to report Aventinus’s 2-2 tie with the Leafs Sunday night. “It…