ANN ARBOR– After completing a 5-0 round robin playoff season with a 3-0 win over Yeti, Ashley’s Aventinus was stunned to find that yet another round of playoffs follow. “We thought this led to a championship game,” said GM Mark…
Ballad of Six-Gun Sutton in Stag Shoot-out Sung
ANN ARBOR–It’s not often that legends are made and from Wild West shootouts between outlaws and lawmen, but history records an incident taking place in a Midwest town known by the residents as Depot Town, where a roving band of…
GM’s New Quiet Life of Painting
PORTLAND, MN– Citing the “stress managing a storied franchise,” GM Mark Woods stepped down from the helm prior to the Fall season, opting for a contemplative life on the shores of Maine, where he now spends his time pursuing the…
Aventinus Sit Up for Joy
ANN ARBOR– Ashley’s Aventinus beat Barracuda 5-1 Wednesday night to push its playoff record to 4-0, earning them a spot in the finals next Wednesday, prompting teammates to celebrate late into the night with beers held with slumped shoulders and…
Carson Threatens to Leave Ruination Party
ANN ARBOR– Following it’s 10-2 win over Mott C Men Tuesday night, Republican candidate and forward Ben Carson threatened to leave Ruination. Citing that the scoring was “gratuitous,” the Detroit native and famed retired neurosurgeon criticized teammates, accusing them of…
Poem Praises Aventinus Win
ANN ARBOR– Following its 5-2 victory over Mott FK Sunday night, Ashley’s Aventinus was lauded by U.S. Poet Laureate Juan Felipe Herrera in a poem lauding the players and the game. What fear in better bitter beer can be seen…